Is Marriage For Me?

This week I am sharing a great article about the true meaning of marriage. Go ahead and click the link to give it a read, and then check out my thoughts on it below.

http://sethadamsmith.com/2013/11/02/marriage-isnt-for-you/

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I would like to start out by saying that this article felt like a nice breath of fresh air in today’s self-orientated society. The idea that you are marrying someone not for personal benefit, but rather for theirs, is pretty uncommon.  With all the noise of celebrity weddings and the perfect moments, followed soon after by the bitter divorces, I think our culture may have lost sight of what true marriage is like. Now I have to admit that I am myself unmarried, so I cannot speak with great authority of what marriage is or should be like. But to me the concept of thinking about what you can give in a marriage, rather than what you receive is a powerful notion. Jesus often spoke of how we should love others just as much as we love ourselves, so it makes sense that our spouse’s concerns and needs should become our own.

I also particularly liked the part about marriage being for your future children as well. Now I know not all of you plan on having children, but it is an important point nonetheless. What kind of person do you want to help you raise your children, and what moral and spiritual guidance will they provide?

The idea of marriage being more about your spouse than yourself should also affect how we look for the right person to spend our life with. I know some girls who have spent more time planning their wedding day than actually looking for the right man to be in it. We need to find someone who we are compatible with, someone whose needs we believe we can fulfill, someone who we can bless and will bless us in return.

While I like and agree with most of the article, there are some points about marriage that I believe should be about you. I have heard some of my Christian friends proudly proclaim that they will marry whomever God sets in their path even if they “are an ugly hobo”. Now while I can appreciate the desire to follow God’s will, I believe this mindset is a mistake. I personally feel that God will bring someone into our lives that we are attracted to, and give us the unique ability to see past their flaws and see His beautiful creation beneath. In essence, we should feel attracted to the person we are to marry, and feel that spark whenever we see them. I strongly believe that if you do not feel that spark of love in your relationship, you should pray hard and consider if you are with the person God has in mind for you.

Marriage is a wondrous thing, a joining of two individuals into a unified whole of mind, spirit, and body. One day I hope I can join the ranks of my married brethren, and experience the joys that it provides. I would ask that you take a moment to consider marriage, no matter your relationship standing, and dwell on how you can make it more about your current or future significant other. As God has so loved us, let us love one another.

As always please leave your thoughts and comments about marriage and what it should entail. I love to hear from our readers!